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Conversations with David Thorne
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scottmintred.com

Conversations with David Thorne
Thursday, January 29, 2009 by scott

 
This is a follow-up to my grand journalistic exposé on David Thorne. It should be obvious to you by now that this trickster is not to be trusted.

I am no idiot! I know that much humour is based upon fiction, for example Short Circuit Part II. However it is when this humour is taken as truth that my ire is provoked. Many people, including my very wife, were sucked in by this poor-man's ruse of the Spider Used to Pay a Bill (and others!).

And I am not content in knowing this, sitting on my duff, watching the world go by! I instead made a great problem for this David Thorne (and his many, many supporters that he invented). I corresponded with him in an heroic act of journalism, which I will now present to you below.

I am well aware that in accusing someone of inventing correspondence for use on the internet it may be assumed that I have, in turn, invented this very correspondence. I can assure you that I have not! These emails are very real, and should be taken to heart by even the coldest of readers!


From: Scott Mintred
To: David Thorne
Subject: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


Firstly, I'd thought at first glance that you were writing some crap about "belly massages", and my interest was immediately piqued.

Secondly, whenupon I did click on the link to that nonsense, I nearly vomited at your hubris!

On top of all that, you have tricked my wife. She said to me, "Oh, look at this crap on the internet".

I said, "No", because I don't like email forwards, least of all those communicated by someone's mouth when they occupy the same couch as myself. It's unavoidable, you see. I cannot use a spam filter there.

She pestered me until I relented, and of course she showed me your web-site.

"Look, this is so funny, he attempted to pay for shit with a spider!"

"Why would he attempt to buy shit at all?"

"No, he attempted to pay a bill with it."

"With shit?"

"A spider."

"Oh."

So you can see my life is not incredibly exciting. However, I have made notice to the public of your ruse on my very own website, one on which you could not possibly lie.

Observe it here, it is not spam, nor a "Rick Roll": http://www.mintred.com/article/143/can_i_pay_for_this_with_fake_comedy/

Please email me back at your earliest opportunity to apologize. (You may alternatively "apologise", if that is more comfortable you).

-_Scott


From: David Thorne
To: Scott Mintred
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


Hello

I am sending you this electronic mail on the internet. Thankyou for yours. I have attached the nude photo you requested. Kmart, who I am sure you are no stranger to, probably have good prices on frames.

Regards, David.


Now let me interject two things here. First, his above message included the following attachment:


I have censored David's face into the manner
of a robot, so as to protect him. He only sent
the black-and-white part of the image.

Second, here is a screen-shot of his email, to demonstrate the pompous way in which his emails are formatted:


He also asserts in each and every email that I should purchase a 27bslash6 shirt. I would find this to be overly obnoxious, were you not also able to purchase a fine, upstanding and classy Mintred Shirt. (You will notice that my shirts are a better deal. They are six US dollars less expensive than David's, but they are at least six or eight sexiness units better than his!)

I assure you that my emails are formatted in a straight-forward manner, with black text and nothing ostentatious, such as a woman.

To continue:


From: Scott Mintred
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


Hi!

Thanks to you for writing back to me so promptly, I know it is summer and tomorrow in Australia, and you probably have better things to do!

Unfortunately you may have caused trouble, for it is today here, and I have not left work. You see, I became instantly aroused by your picture and commenced a vigorous masturbation! One that was, due to my being thoroughly distracted by your picture, witnessed by our overweight Salvadorean cleaning lady. (I'm not sure if that's how one would specify a person from El Salvador, but how relevant can such a mistake possibly be?)

Now she is cleaning the underside of my desk, and I am emailing you back from the computer of a co-worker.

I have no need of a frame from K-Mart, because I will not be printing your picture. You see, it is in such a low resolution that I would be required to squint at it, which is hardly the most desirable way in which to view a picture-on-display. (I could "blow it up", obviously, but then it would be all pixelated to hell, hardly doing it justice).

I notice that you have yet to apologize for your site's content. I wager that you have not inspected my page either, wherein I accuse you of nefarious doings.

You are not to be trusted.

Scott


From: David Thorne
To: Scott Mintred
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


Bahaha® But I have indeed 'inspected' your page, I click on every link that anybody sends me. One day one of those letters from a nigerian bank trying to transfer money out of the country is going to be legitimate and who will be laughing then I ask you. Me. I even left a small comment and forwarded your link to friends as I found it quite amusing. You will, however, receive NO apology for my sites content for I will never apologise for pointless distractions. You are incorrect though. Funny. But incorrect.

Regards, David.


From: Scott Mintred
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


I fail to understand how you've registered a laugh as a trademark, but it is certain that you have a lot of people to sue.

My good wife had pointed out that you had left a comment on my web-site. I don't believe in looking at it too often, lest I be dubbed "vain" by some assholes. I do appreciate the comment, though the unfortunate thing of this ordeal is that viewers of my page (there are 5 of them, now that you have viewed it) will think that I invented your comment in an act of hypocrisy!

Your website was a humorous distraction, and I did enjoy browsing it (somewhat obsessively, if you must know!) I now feel as if I know this Thomas and that Lucien very well, and I have until now not known anyone named Lucien. So that's good too!

I had a nagging suspicion that I'd just made something up, and of course I meant to say "Lucius". Though this name is also new to me, insofar as I've not met anyone with that name.

Do let me know if you're ever in the States and up for a game of cards..

-_Scott


From: David Thorne
To: Scott Mintred
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


:)™

My favourite part of that page is my pink eyes. Will do.

Regards, David.


From: Scott Mintred
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: I complain about your page "Belly messages"


Magenta!


And that would be all, were it not for his revealing comment to the instigating page:


confession

You have caught me out with your awesome detective skills. I had thought I had gotten away with the perfect crime but I had not figured on your scrutiny. It is now apparent to all that I simply 'make this stuff up' to fool the world for my own unknown reasons but what is not realised is that because the other people are real voices in my head, this counts as a medical condition. Please feel pity and send me money.

Regards, David.

P.S. The E's all look very different to me.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009 by David


And now I will respond to a few choice comments. Mind you that most of these comments were probably left by David himself, usually in the guise of a woman! It was also David whom voted the article down to its current rating of NEGATIVE 27. I know this from IP addresses. Unless he is running a fat farm of users sharing the same IP address, which I do not think that he is. I will let this tremendously negative number stand, only such that you can see of what menace his character is composed!


Desire..

I want to Penetrate David Thorne. Not in the ejaculatory way. I want to penetrate him with a knife. Then I want to defecate on his bed sheets after he has just washed them. Then I want to smear orange juice pulp inside his belly button. Then I want to eviscerate his pet. If he has one. And especially if not.

And also... Make this fncking comment typing area bigger you dirty Mintred cunt.

And next time... don't ask his permission. Just do it.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009 by RegisCake


I understand that this is probably David Himself, demonstrating his self-loathing and horror-show mind. As such, I will leave it to you, the reader, to draw conclusions.

As for my comment area: No.

And I have no idea when I'd asked his permission for anything whatsoever. I accused him of being a phony, and untrustworthy.


website

"He runs a web site that is arguably arranged in a more artsy-fartsy manner than mine."

I think you might find David is a designer by trade. Besides, I prefer your website design Scott, it shows you don't care and I have heard that beige is the new black. Plus there is too much technology and clean design on the internet, your 80's look makes me feel comfortable because I am old and scared by new things.

Thursday, January 29, 2009 by Craig Elston


I you think I might find that he is? You keep thinking that.

Yes, I prefer my design better as well! It is why I invented it! However your sarcasm is undue. My site is not in fact beige, it is a color I've made up: Priceless Coral. It is also cleaner than David's very site. I do not have boxes everywhere full of supplementary content, and pictures of men with fruity haircuts.


Impressive skill set

Your very impressive and sleuth-like detective skills are amazing. Now that I look back... I wonder how I didn't realise that it was all a sham. Thank you.... thank you so much for exposing this fraud and making my work day that much more boring. I hope that your website gets that many more hits for its connection with his, despite how undeserved those hits may be.

Yours in admiration, Hayley

PS - Your site doesn't "bother me" in the way you seemed to think it would. Sorry... but it doesn't really evoke a response at all.

Thursday, January 29, 2009 by Hayley


Thank you Hayley, it is always good to meet a fan. Most especially one that asserts to be female. Do not tell my wife, but I am flattered!

Ah, but it did evoke a response. Observe your response. (And the slogan refers to bothering me, not you. Which should be obvious from the use of the word "me").


Handwriting

This page kind of reads like you are jealous of the popularity Davids site has. Some people might see it as tall poppy syndrome. I thought the pun bit at the end was funny though.

Thursday, January 29, 2009 by Karen


Karen! You must be a friend of Hayley's! You do not arouse me to the same degree, however. I believe it may be your name. I do not know what "tall poppy syndrome" is, but if it has to do with drugs then count me in. Perhaps you and Hayley would form a club of admirers for me. That would be excellent, and I would even advise as to the design of your website!


He found the first image?

So you are saying that he was just on google images and he happened to find a guy with no top on with "I want to be inside you D.T." written on his stomach which is his initials (amazingly coincidental) and he made the rest up? Fuck it is so obvious now! Do you go to a special school?

Thursday, January 29, 2009 by Phil


No. That is not at all what I am "saying". I claim that he was in fact purposefully looking at pictures of topless men on Google Images. This would indeed raise the probability that he would find an image with the initials "D.T." in a message on a topless man's abdomen. It is a coincidence, I agree. "D.T." could stand for any number of things: Duke Therman, Dental Typecasting, Diabolical Tushy, Dan Thergood, Dip Theria, and yes, even David Thorne.

You will notice that I took the word "Idiot" off the end of your comment. I did not like it.


the belly page

I think the best page on davids site is the ikea page with simon making the experience painful. I laugh every time I read that. If David wrote a book I would buy it. This site isn't very good though.

Thursday, January 29, 2009 by Colleen Meller


David, you will have to buy more than just one copy of your own book in the guise of a woman to make it worthwhile.

You are entitled to your opinion regarding my site, irrespective of how wrong and fundamentally incorrect and moronic your opinion is. I am glad to correct you though! It is a good day for us all!


I trust that this settles the matter for everyone.
     
Rating
-736
(40 to 776)
  BAHAHAHA®
  Classic. How exactly have you "made a great problem for this David Thorne"? The only thing you have made is an attempt to gain some of the sixty thousand odd hits I receive a day by associating yourself with my site. Some people may call this desperate, I call it entertaining. For the record, I left a single comment on the last page and took that page with the humour I thought it was intended with. This follow page I will assume is due to that page receiving more hits than you have had in the entire time your site has been running. I checked your stats and they average around sixty hits a week - on a good week. BAHAHAHA® You are not even in the game.
  Thursday, January 29, 2009 by David
  Samson McHubrisaville
  Pray tell how I am gaining traffic from your site by doing this? Unless you link to my site from yours, I would obtain no traffic at all from your site! If I were to write an accusatory article about Yahoo's CEO, I assume then by your logic that I would benefit from all of Yahoo's traffic? Absurd!

This page is due to my following through on the issue, as I explained within it!

Although your hubris is, I'm sure, well intended, I can only assume from it that your site had 60,000 hits per day on the day it launched. Oh, did it not?

My site is for my own amusement. Your site is apparently for your own bragging rights.

Bahahahah. My masterful journalistic enterprise has hit a nerve!
  Thursday, January 29, 2009 by scott
  Animosity
  Actually, I responded to your email to me in good nature, I found your page vaguely amusing and even forwarded it to friends. I would hardly say it or anything else on the site is well written but that was not the point, it amused me. You on the other hand seem to have some animosity towards myself and the success of my site. Generally people would be hesitant to express their resentment and jealousy in a public forum but as this particular forum has an audience of about ten I guess it is no huge sacrifice. I will put it down as an outlet for the other current failures in your life, I am used to being focused on. Keep up the good work, I understand level 43 dwarf in warcraft is an accomplishment of some form.

Regards, David.
  Thursday, January 29, 2009 by David
  Animosasity
  I have no such animosity! I have no care for the success of your site. I merely point out that whilst prominent news sources and blogs have claimed your articles to be true correspondence, they are not.

I had no idea how much traffic you had until you told me, moments ago. To be fair I assumed that your popularity was of the "15 minute" variety surrounding your Spider debacle 2 months ago, and that yours was a site-for-your-own-amusement as well. Now that I know you fancy yourself a powerhouse of internet commerce, I feel less compassion.

You needn't take this so seriously though, it is all in good fun..
  Thursday, January 29, 2009 by scott
  Dear amused and large
  I now see that this all goes back to the fact that your wife Lesley was on David's page. I also think that you should thank David for making you funny. You really do owe him a lot. Maybe you should draw him a picture.
  Friday, January 30, 2009 by Mandy
  Bullshit
  It couldn't possibly be David who commented down 27 times as I know I did at least 25 times after reading your limping effort meant to resemble humor. I can tell you firsthand, as was earlier mentioned, that writing on one’s stomach does cause one’s penmanship to revert to basic patterns. It is a hobby of mine that occupies my weekends. And, check this IP address as I am nowhere near Australia.
  Friday, January 30, 2009 by Holly
  BOREDOM.
  Your site re-defines it.
  Friday, January 30, 2009 by RegisCake (Ross Amorelli)
  Pathetic
  Like the kid in school that was never quite as funny as the class clown. Making himself throw up one day for attention, thinking it will be funny, but now everyone thinks he is even more annoying and desperate. (I love David)
  Friday, January 30, 2009 by Caitlin
  Saddening
  I only came to this site because David wrote about it on his. I find your emasculation to be quite humourus.
  Friday, January 30, 2009 by Phoenix
  Unless you link to my site from yours...
  "Unless you link to my site from yours, I would obtain no traffic at all from your site!"

He has linked your site from his, he wrote an article about you and made a TShirt as well. Seriously dude, I have never heard of you before going to his site. Yes you are basking in his reflected popularity.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Georgie
  A Genuine Question for Scott
  Hi Scott,

I am just writing to enquire as to why you have a "Popular" section on your website?

Warm Regards,
Hayley the Invented.

PS - Please check my IP address. I think you will find that I have commented on your site under only one pseudonym.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Hayley the Invented
  you
  not funny
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by shelley
 
  I love you
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Puskat
 
  I know you're into boys but would you ever consider cats?
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Puskat
  YOU bother me
  “... it's all a pack of lies, lit by a lighter of deceit and smoked by Satan himself.”

Much like the crack you must have smoked in order to write the shit on this website.

Now let me use my powers of deduction.... if everything David wrote in his article about you is true, his other articles are also likely to be true. Wow! Powers of deduction are awesome. (I originally deduced the fact that you smoke crack from your statement that David's website “is far less humorous” than yours).

I also want to point out (!) that the use of exclamation marks (!) at the end of every sentence (!) does not make what you (!) write any less unfunny!
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Frances
  is
  Best left unspoken!
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by This
  David's Friends of Long Standing and Little Imagination
  @Mandy: I am working on publishing a scathing image whilst we speak.

@Holly: I don't really care about your IP address. I was only arguing that I have it.

@RegisCake: I believe there is a new episode of [YourCountryHere] Idol, which should provide the excitement that your intellectual capabilities require.

@Caitlin: I'm sorry to hear that you threw up at yourself on purpose, and that you are a man.

@Georgie: Yes, he linked to my site. AFTER I wrote my comment indicating that he did not. I could go back and alter it, or maybe I should just travel through time to appease you?

@Hayley: That section indicates which articles are most popular, as rated by the buttons on the bottom. Could you not grasp that?

PS - Don't care.

@Puskat: Love you too! We should meet up, as soon as my wife's bills are paid up.

And no, I have never considered cats for love-making. They seem as if they would make a great ruckus over it.

@Frances: Awesome observations! You are a powerhouse of a lack of emphasis!
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by scott
  That's it. I can't take it anymore.
  Is there a POINT to all this STUPID BULLSHIT THAT YOU WRITE? You HACK.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Rov
  Hayley the Invented
  "I am just writing to enquire as to why you have a "Popular" section on your website?"

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Possibly the funniest thing I have read in months. I was actually in tears. I love Hayley the Invented.

  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Stuart Gillespie
  mintred shirts?
  Are you serious? Your shirts are less expensive than the ones on 27b/6 but thats because you couldnt give them away. Have you sold even one? Why would anyone wnt one? I bought 2 shirts, the 27b/6 logo one because I love the website and the spider one for my teenage daughter because she thinks it is cute. I was happy to pay extra because it felt like I was giving something back to David for the many hours he has had me in tears of laughter. I am going to buy one of the Go Scott tshirts after I have finished writing this. Your shop just has a bad logo, a chicken thing, something about mayor this that i suppose you thought was funny or something and some stuff for code crunchers with a bad picture of a cog. I woudlnt wear any of these if you gave them to me. I dont get why you have a bee in your bonnet i thought his reply to you was polite. If I was him i wouldnt have bothered with the time of day.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Sarah B
  T-Shirts and Bee Shirts
  @Rov: You are not required to read it as this is not part of your school assignments. You also have a poorly construed name.

@Sarah B: I am truly sorry to hear about your lack of fashion sense. I suspect that perhaps you live in the south, like Kentucky or some such backwards place. I think you should hold off on the "Go Scott" T-Shirt purchase, because if perhaps one day David updates it with an actual picture of me, you will regret not having such a handsome man on your chest. Were I to assume you to be attractive, I would insert a sexual joke about being on your chest here, but as you are from Kentucky I will refrain.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by scott
 
  After trying to give your site the best possible chance at amusing me, it failed miserably. Enjoy your undeserved hit rate for the next weeks.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by 27bslash6 reader
  Summer of Love. Well, winter, if you're in the hemisphere that "matters"
  Good thing people from Aust®alia don't have opinions that count. Did you know that Aust®alia has more hippie communes at present than the entirety of upstate New York hosted in 1969?
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Kitty
  ^ Fail
  Seems Scott does have a friend. Kitty above. Possibly his wife. Possibly just Scott. I checked the IP address and they are the same. I also checked the stats she/he mentioned, seems she/he made them up. Probably to give the whole 'summer of love' pun some form of merit I guess. Nice try but FAIL.

  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Jake (from gaynada)
  Nice Site
  Well I thought your site was funny Scott. I liked the drawings. Are you a professional illustrator or is just a hobby. If it is just a hobby then you should be a professional because you would make lots of money.
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Brett
  These and Those Hippies
  @27blash6 reader Von Anonymous: Yes, I am familiar with people that have no senses of humour such as yourself. Please do continue to look at websites and not "get" them.

@Kitty: Yes, your comment is very accurate! Perhaps they will one day figure out how to send a man to the moon, but they will probably just get drunk instead.

@Canadian Jake: It was not in fact my wife, just a person with taste and an understanding of the world at large.

You cannot "check IP addresses" on my site, but thanks for assuming that you can and did. It was a nice try, and you did indeed fail.

@Brett: You are very excellent at parroting David's very site! You should obtain a job such as scribe where you just write what other people have written. It does not take much intelligence, so I'm certain that you will succeed!
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by scott
  This Page
  So this page is basically about you putting a private email conversation you had on your public website for everyone to see AND commenting on other peoples comments.

Do you realise this makes you look like a complete wanker?
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Michelle
  button for the blind
  David does raise a valid point though - what is the audio button for the blind for? Yes I realize it is to read the text on the page but if you are blind how do you find the button. Do you need someone to click it for you and if so why couldn't they just read it to you?
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Jen
  u got owned
  david thorne is awesome. you are not. deal with it!
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Mia
  Why do you change peoples comments?
  Also, why did you change Jake from Canada to "jake from gaynada" and Shelly's name to "Shelly the Unclever Bitch"? Did you not like what they said?
  Saturday, January 31, 2009 by Jen
  Mayor This
  You are not affiliated with the television series Family Guy in any way. Selling "Mayor This" T-Shirts under the title "Mayor This Family Guy T-Shirt" or any other title is a breach of trademark and copyright laws. Cafe Press and the respective copyright owners have been notified.

Kylie Jackson. Europa Press
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by K.Jackson
  T-Shirts and Name Changes
  @Michelle: Yes, that is in essence what it is about. You've smartly hit the nail on the head. It's too bad you've commented though, because now you are part of it, and now we are wankers all.

@Jen: I never said that the audio button was for the blind. Please ask David, as he was the one to make that assumption.

@Mia: I do believe slavery is illegal, and I am in fact owned by no one.

@Jen (oh lord, again!): I'm glad that you are a repeat visitor and noticed the change! Thank you for patronizing my site, and taking the time to re-read all of my fantastic witticisms and journalism. We need more of your type here at MintRed.com!

To answer your question, I did not like Jake's mockery of David by using a copyright symbol for the "C" in Canada. I felt it both mocked David (and you know that I would tolerate no such thing!) and also demeaned the fine name of Canada. So I implied that he was in fact gay. (Nothing wrong with that of course, and he will not be offended unless he himself is a bigot!)

As for Shelly? Well, she wrote the same exact post in the comment section of over 10 of my articles, and the comment was not substantive, but bitchy. So I modified her name to include that she was a bitch. Simple logic there.

@K .Jackson: How do you press all of Europe at once? Or do you use a small dirt tamp and do it very slowly? Bhahahahah.

Anyway, I'm sure my sleep will be disturbed greatly as I wait for letters from Seth MacFarlane's lawyers and from Cafe Press themselves. They will surely pull my T-Shirts from offering, and possibly take my house and my car and maybe even my wife! Then I will be sleeping on the ground with a balled-up "Mayor This" T-Shirt as my only possession.

Wait, I was wrong. I could care less. I made that shirt about 6 years ago to wear to a theme party, and never really thought about it since.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by scott
  Monitors
  Dude. I was looking at the girls on your monitors and they are all really hot except that one on the big black monitor in the middle. Her arse is friggin HUGE. It is disgusting. Do you like really fat chicks or something? Whats the deal there?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jeremy
  the emails
  Hello Scott. I was just wondering if you asked David's permission before posting a private email conversation on your website. If you did and he was ok with it then thats fine but if you didnt then that would be a pretty low act. As you say he makes all his up on his website I will assume you would not use that as justification.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Alexis
  Perturbed
  So, you wrote a web page about David's web page and sent him an email saying so. Then when he replied in good faith, you pretended to be friendly and then posted the emails (that he more than likely assumed were between you and him) in an attempt to tear him down more... This hints at being slightly stalkerish to me. Resentful and envious at best. I have always found David's site good natured, even when he is being a prick, this page and the previous just seems kind of mean. I am not sure what your problem or point is and I would feel embarrassed if I was you. No offence, just calling it as I see it. Jase.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jason Harris
  Yeah
  I think David is a jerk. But he is fucking funny. Your just a jerk.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Mike. K.
  btw
  You check my ip address as well. I am from Colombia 'dicklock'.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Mike. K.
  hurt brain
  I discovered your site through David's. All I can say is that reading your terrible writing gave me a headache. I'm not exactly eloquent but that's why I don't publish written material. Please tell me why your wife is still with you because obviously you love naked men.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by someone
  Please...
  ...somebody kill me. I would rather be dead than read this shit.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Fred
  um
  you are saying everybody is david then? so I am david too? thank god as I would hate to be Carl as he hasent done his homework for tomorrow. Man you are lame.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Carl
  hey little guy
  "Now let me interject two things here"

1. you suck
2. you suck
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Dan
  Hey Jeremy
  I notice that as well. All girls on computer screens very nice except one on black computer screen with really big fat bottom of disgusting pig.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Urov
  Busy Scott
  Have you written David a thank you card?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Huge Fan
  question
  surely you must be getting embarassed by now?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by laughing
  ...
  ok Scott - you win - you ARE funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Shelley the Unclever Bitch
  website subscription
  I love your website Scott. Can I please subscribe to your newsletter. Your stuff is a lot funnier than Davids and your writing skills are better too. I also think you are much better looking than David and heaps better at warcraft than him. I dont want to subscribe to his newsletter. Just yours. Because you are funny. And he is not.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jackie
 
  Jackie - I couldn't agree with you more. Scott is soooooooooo much funnier than David. Scott should have a newsletter so we could all subscribe to his newsletter and not David's. Because Scott is funny, like herpes.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Sam
  Sam,
  Herpes can be funny sometimes, like those ads that try to make it seem ok and lots of people get herpes but everyone knows that only cheap dirty sluts get herpes.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jackie
  Jackie
  what about haemorrhoids?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Sam
  Sam & Jackie
  I think herpes and haemorrhoids are both fun - but what about syphilis!
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Josh
  Jackie, Sam and Josh
  what if you had all three at once AND your name was Scott?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by B.J.
  Things that are funnier than this website:
  1. Herpes
2. Hemorrhoids
3. Car Accidents
4. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
5. A Rock
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Christine
 
  Christine, I believe you speak for us all
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by the world
  This site
  is meant to be funny?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Lisa
  Popular?
  I don't think you can technically have a "popular" section if the scores are all negative.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by the by
 
  The best part of this website is the Bad button. I feel like I'm chastising Scott every time I click on it. Bad Scott. Bad, Bad Scott.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Dominatrix
  HAHAHAHA!
  All the votes have dropped to minus figures. That is hilarious. It is refreshing to see something funny on this site.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Lisa
  Scott is a Genius
  By providing us with such horrendous material to tear down, Scott has actually created a spectacularly amusing (though purely comment-driven) site.

Kudos to you Scott on what is now a rather entertaining site.

I would like to think that you masterminded the whole thing but in consideration of your dull-witted response to my previous comment regarding the popular section, I very highly doubt it.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Hayley the Invented
  Name
  nimterd !!!
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Holly
  Things that are funnier than this website #2
  6. Cancer
7. Heather Mills
8. Plastic
9. Missing Children
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Joy
 
  Roflmfao @ Nimterd
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Hayley the Invented
  this site
  is less funny than orphans with cancer.

all these pages you write, are for what?

fuck, you are in dire need of a life (or a sense of humour)...or maybe just something.

perhaps a clue?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by pava
  Nope
  Not a man, very much a 19 year old female from Kansas. I know it may be hard to believe that a REAL woman, other than your wife, would read any of this bullshit on your site--- but you see if it weren't for the mind blowingly hot David Thorne posting a link to your website from his, I would have never heard of you. You should start being funny, or just quit blogging all together, this bothers me.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Caitlin
  BAHAHA
  BAHAHA.

Did you read that David? Mind Blowingly Hot.

You sexy motherfucker.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Lucy of Arabia
  scot bites the big one
  JEEESUS CHRIST! apart from your moronic self who could find this funny or even briefly amusing, it is honestly painful to read your drivel and your tryhard attemtps at using 'witty' words and phrases. the only thing i have laughed at is the fact that you take yourself so seriously with the shit your writing.Anyway here's a tip go find a sharpened pencil and use it deflate your massively swolen head.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by hex_me
  You're right
  David is probably not to be trusted in some ways, and he seems to be a trickster. Nonetheless he is captivating and hilarious. I think your site is somewhat charming in that it means a great deal to you; however, calling attention to something that is making you feel insecure breeds both negative and positive attention. You know that though as any publicity is good publicity, no?
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Beauty
  My IQ
  Dropped several points after looking through your site.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Lara
  Dear Mintard
  Check this IP, you'll find its not David. David has provided me with hours of entertainment while at work, people like you should be permanently banned from the internet. seriously.
hope you fall down the stairs,
regards, Aimee
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Aimee
  Audio button for the blind
  Ok, if the audio button is not for blind people, what is it for? Are we meant to click on it so that your text gets read out to us while we are reading? What for? I thought maybe it would be useful to putting me to sleep or something but the content is just so fu*king bad that I would be too annoyed to fall asleep. I just don't get what the button is for at all. It is fu*king stupid.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by L.T.
  So Funny I laughed out loud!
  No, not you, the person named Dominatrix a few posts up that wrote: "The best part of this website is the Bad button. I feel like I'm chastising Scott every time I click on it. Bad Scott. Bad, Bad Scott." Gold.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by L.T.
  You should be encouraged
  I don't know why everyone is giving you a hard time Scott, encouragement is the key to development. You should be encouraged and helped along the way. Like a retarded child with a butter knife, if we persevere and show you how to use the knife properly, eventually you will stop stabbing yourself in the eye.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Brett
  I'm not gay.
  I'm not.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Lucius
  Powerhouse
  Stop abusing this word you damn fool!
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Aimee
  I am in Prison
  Hello Scott, I am writing this to you from my prison cell. Every day my life is a living hell, I am beaten, raped and have been stabbed four times this week. Once in the ear. It is still better than reading your site though.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Prisoner 1782
  Wow!
  I thought that David might have been just taking the piss but this site really is bad.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jasmine
  Hello Scott
  Hi.I was just wondering if you were regretting starting this? Personally I think you would have known that David would retaliate and that he is better at it than you and you would get hits out of it. Thats what I would like to think anyway. Best wishes, Jessica.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Jessica
  Invoice for keyboard.
  Dear Scott, while I was reading your site I was so bored I fell asleep and spilled coffee on my keyboard, rendering it sticky unpleasant to use. I trust you will send me the $39.95 it will cost me to buy a replacement, as I am putting the blame for this unfortunate incident squarely on your shoulders. Please reply immediately as I fear that soon the coffee will completely stick the keys together and I will not be able to type.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Alida
  I love this thread
  I really do. It has had me laughing a lot and I think Scott shows good nature in not deleting it. I suppose he cant really as that would make him look a dick but anyway. This mini play-war has had me in stitches. And for the record - this site really is terrible.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Elle
  WTF?
  I had a look through a few of the pages on here and this can't be real. Nobody in their right mind would think this site is real. It is the worst site on the internet if it is and should get a trophy or something. David set up this site as part of the joke right? Right? Please god somebody tell me I am right.
  Sunday, February 01, 2009 by Brian
  An example of Scott's Superior Grammar Skills
  "Yes I prefer my design better as well"
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Hayley the Invented
  Part 2: An Example of Scott's Superior Intellect
  "However, I have made notice to the public of your ruse on my very own website, one on which you (David Thorne) could not possibly lie"
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Hayley the Invented
  Just One More Question
  Will you be doing a Conversations with David, Part 2, in which your attempts at defending yourself will be continued? You should, it would give you another opportunity to astound us with some fresh examples of poor sentence structure and ill conceived assertions.

Regards,

You're biggest fan and most ardent admirer.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Hayley the Invented.
  The problem with the Internet...
  Is that it gives everyone a voice. Some, like David Thorne's 27b/6 are hilarious. Genius. Gold and a rare find. Then you get a site like this with some pedantic fuckwit trying to playa hate and piggy back off his fame.

I'm not sticking up for DT just cos I'm from the same city as him, I'm telling you that this site is moronic. I'd tell everyone else too but I think they can already see it.

Maybe this passes for legitimate humour in the US. And yes, Humour is spelt correctly. I'm coming over in a few months on my honeymoon. If Americans are all this stupid, I can't wait.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Barx
  Oh Dear
  I see Mr Thorne is ankle deep in his "playground" once again. The problem with playing with him is that it often gets you in over your head. By picking a fight with David, you just give him what he wants and I hate to admit it but he is pretty good at his "game". Good luck.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by George
  4 pages was all I could handle
  I would rather kiss a clown than read this site and I really fucking hate clowns.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Chris
  jeopoardy
  anyone in Australia see tonights Jeopardy on foxtel? Missed the final jeopardy question. Do the 2nd and 3rd placers get to keep the money made? they should.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by stottle
  Entertain Me!
  Entertain me fuck you! ENTERTAIN ME!! FAIL!
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Simon
  Okay
  I'm not entirely sure how you found your way into my internets, Mr M|ntred, but could you please leave.

And lock the door behind you.

Thankyou for your cooperation.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Yes
  Did u know MINTRED is an anagram of RIM DENT?
  "american invented internet"
is that some like secret parallel internet that you guys keep secret from us using the one invented by some british guy?
Where do you pull all those shitty phrases from anyway? did you pull them from that big "Advanced Phrases for Level 42 Dwarfs for use on Mere Mortals"?
If David makes his shit up, and he invented you as part of his made up shit, it would be quite funny though, unlike this site.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Chris
 
  Has anyone noticed that Scott has been deleting select messages? !!! I wonder if he tells his mummy about them... I ONLY REMOVED THE GUY WHOM POSTED ONLY EXCLAMATION MARKS AND NO OTHER CONTENT AS THAT WAS JUST SPAM. I ALSO MODIFIED YOUR WANKERISH POSTING.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by
  ^ Did that make any sense?
  I do not think Scott has deleted anything. What "emails" are you referring to?
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Not jared
  You're Not Funny
  Go and watch a film called 'The King of Comedy'.
It stars Robert De Niro as a character called Rupert Pupkin - a sad, pathetic little man who is trying to make it big as a stand up comedian - yet he just can not see that HE IS NOT FUNNY AT ALL TO ANYONE!
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Dicklock apparently
  Scott
  You are a thunderbox.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Mandy
  you sad, sad man.
  Hi Scott,

Never have I visited a website which was more boring than yours. You are a sad, sad little man. And you stink! You suck gigantic buckets of ass! I pity your wife, but I can see why she has 3 or 4 jobs. Just to be somewhere else than with your pityful person. Keep on sucking, dicklock!

Warmest regards,

Bob
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by Bob Karsemeyer
  Your Comments
  I have of course taken all of your comments to heart, and am taking a long and deep look at the very innards of my soul.

While I am busy doing that, you can by all means observe my responses to your comments (which will I'm sure allay all of your idiotic concerns) by hitting up the "Later" link below.
  Monday, February 02, 2009 by scott
 
  I've got to be honest, I've grown quite fond of this site. I know its not what this site was intended for, but by God the bitching and mayhem is entertaining. I do get a laugh out of comments by people advising how much they hate this site, but continually come back.
I guess the only down point here is that its mainly the random, insulting and repetitive comments that keep me coming back, not the articles you write. But in the end, this site was created by you for yourself, so if your having fun that's all that matters.
Also whilst I am actually a fan of David's site, I think some of the more violent and personally attacking messages from other fans are kinda scary. Austrian step father who owns a locked basement scary! (That's AUSTRIAN, not AUSTRALIAN, for those Americans reading this. look it up on an atlas)
  Thursday, February 05, 2009 by Ash via Australia
  This Site
  This site's a bit gay isnt it?
  Friday, February 06, 2009 by Tim - Better than Shelley
  Yep.
  @Tim - Better'n Shelly: Only since you've started posting.
  Friday, February 06, 2009 by scott
  ROTFLMAO
  I have not had a reason to type that acronym for quite some time, but returning to this page to find the comments that appeared over the course of a week has literally put me off my chair in mirth. There are so many fucking tools on this planet! I don't even know what to say.
Except haha
haha
hahahahhahahahahahahahah
  Sunday, February 08, 2009 by Kitty
  @ kitty
  The most toolish of which are those who use acronyms to describe a state of humour, or laughter.
  Monday, February 09, 2009 by brendan
  OMG U IDIOT
  @brendan: Just because you can't remember what LOL stands for, don't take it out on everyone else. How would you have people express their feelings and actions online? Should we take a picture of ourselves emoting each time and email it to you? Or should we write a 3000 word (or more) essay on our feelings and actions and then FedEx it to you?

Please, I'm dying to know what your suggestion is..
  Monday, February 09, 2009 by scott
  Are you serious?
  I still can't figure out whether or not this Scott guy is serious....

I want to believe that he is being sarcastic and intentionally unfunny, but the more i read, the more i realise he actually thinks what he is writing is amusing.

Scott, one word of advice for you champ..... end it now.
  Tuesday, February 10, 2009 by MF
  Samuel Jackson?
  @MF: I only have one guess as to what "MF" stands for. Let's just say it starts with "mother" and ends with "fucker".

Seems about right.
  Wednesday, February 11, 2009 by scott
  @ Scott
  OMG ROTFLMAO! LOLZ! Fuck you. If you have an emotion to share, don't. I fyou are truly laughing out loud, or rolling on the floor in laughter, then how are you typing?

Dick.
  Thursday, February 26, 2009 by brendan
  @Sighendan
  @brendan: You are very astute, questioning how I can literally ROTF whilst typing. I have never claimed to do this, but in fact "Kitty" claimed it.

Your inability to follow a thread of comments makes you seem all the more retarded.

LAWL.
  Thursday, February 26, 2009 by scott
  retardation
  @Scott: My question was rhetorical - as you responded to a comment of mine to kitty, I'm sure you were aware that this who i was referring to.

My inability to follow a comments section? I'm deeply hurt. Now take my advice, and go fuck yourself. Hard.
  Friday, February 27, 2009 by brendan
  Star Wars Spoons
  You are obnoxious and seem to believe for some demented reason that you are funny. Please stop this "blog", if you would care to call it that, because you are damaging the image that the United States portrays to the rest of the world. If people begin to believe that all Americans share your sense of humor I fear that other countries may use nuclear weapons against us in an attempt to save the rest of the world from the nonsense spewed forth from this page. I know your skills of deduction are world-renowned, but you may have missed the fact that of any recent comments made by anyone but yourself seem to be in favor of David Thorne and his website. This should constitute some sort of hint or sign that you should cease and desist. Please stop with this nonsense, it is utter crap.
  Monday, March 23, 2009 by United Stats of America
  Idiot.
  Indeed I would not care to call this a "blog".

weblog n. a personal Web site that provides updated headlines and news articles of other sites that are of interest to the user, also may include journal entries, commentaries and recommendations compiled by the user;

It does not mention cartoons at all.
  Tuesday, March 24, 2009 by scott
  About the e-mail
  It's called a signature, you douche. He didn't ask you in particular for money -_-
  Friday, June 05, 2009 by Kane
 
  hahaha, I only came to this site through davids and wont be visiting again, accept his superiority why dont you? face it mate, you're clearly not funny.
  Monday, June 08, 2009 by Jonny
  you're just embarassing yourself
  oh man, i bet you must've grown up being the butt of all jokes and not even realize it.
  Saturday, June 13, 2009 by tim
  I didn't realise you could actually get worse.
  Hello once more, Scott.

I realise that I am coming into this rather late in the game, and for that I apologise. I would like to point out that I did not require the links from Mr Thorne's page, which seem to have been removed at your request - I was quite able to find this on my own.
This is perhaps going to be something that truly should "bother you", as it means the attention is not likely to stop until you remove your site from your American Internets.

When we are young we learn about interaction between people, the things which will elicit negative responses and which we should avoid in our later lives.
I only bring this to your attention because I am honestly worried that you are the same in your everyday life as you present yourself upon this page. I would far prefer that you take that long hot bath with your favourite toaster instead of being beaten to pulp and left in a congealing pool of your own blood, excrement, urine and vomit on the floor of your local grocery store.

Have a lovely day.
  Saturday, July 04, 2009 by Astounded
  You know,
  Thorne kinda owes you. Every time you blog his site gets funnier.
You should ask him for writing/design/comedy lessons, he'd be sorta obliged and you could really use the help.
  Sunday, July 05, 2009 by John-O
  you are in fact the dicklock
  hahaha David Thorne is so much better than you! you are jalous and probably have a tiny penis. David Thorne is hilarious, like Tubes from Soccer AM or the Mighty Boosh, classic comedy that never fails to make me laugh...basically you are shit. Go David.
  Tuesday, July 14, 2009 by irish
  I agree, women ARE too ostentatious!
  d.t., you pretentious jerk!
  Wednesday, July 15, 2009 by michael
  You suck cock
  You aren't funny man, just stop.

I feel bad for you. Your whole site blows, for reals.
  Sunday, July 19, 2009 by Rawr
  You should rename this article:
  "Look at David Thorne prove how much better he is than me, even though I am writing the article, thus diminishing my already low self esteem."

Maybe shorten it, just for aesthetical value.
  Sunday, July 19, 2009 by Max Fightmaster
  i just did a poo
  and some of it stuck to the bowl. i just thought you would want to know
  Wednesday, August 05, 2009 by drakul
  mandy was right
  For the record, the only way I found your site was through david's, whom you give more power to than anyone by calling him "David Himself."

You're just pissed because your wife laughs harder at david's site than yours. She probably found your site through his, too, just like the rest of us.

Oh, and thanks for telling us we can't trust people on the internet. Not the internet! It was the last place we could take things for face value!

  Wednesday, August 05, 2009 by david is funny
  Thorne
  Ripped you a new one.
  Wednesday, August 05, 2009 by Mookie
 
  Haha, you're such a twat. David > You
  Friday, August 07, 2009 by james
  this site blows
  i need to get a time machine and tell myself to refrain from coming to this site.
  Sunday, August 09, 2009 by wtf
  One comment among many
  See, I came upon David's website and from B3ta.com and it entertained me. If some of it's fake, it's fake.. it's still full of comedy. It's not all fake tho -obviously.. unless David's created a fictional Mintred character and set up a fictional blog site.. that a little too elaborate methinks.

I came here because of the story on his website.. curiosity.

I've not read David's stuff before now, nor had I read yours. His site is funny, and maybe he can comes across as a bit of whackjob, but you come across as a total snooty dick. After reading your stuff, my first impression is that I just don't like you, and shouldn't that be the point of a blogspot?

Even your "leave a comment" link comes to this page, where it says "leave a comment, dicklock". It's not funny.. it's pompous and totally dicky.

I guess overall, it shows how being an egotistical "i'm better than you" prick doesn't make any friends. Too bad too because with a fun attitude you could have used your notable literary skills to actually entertain us. I hope you're nice to your wife at least.
  Sunday, August 16, 2009 by Farnsworth
  He sent you nude pictures!
  So, all I have to do to get sexy nude pictures of David is to write a generally boring, rambling blog and make weak attacks at his superior comedic skills! Hot damn, I'd better get to work on that!
  Thursday, August 20, 2009 by Jealous!
  A lot of catching up to do.
  @Kane: I know it's in his signature, you shit-eating mama's boy (I can only assume that this describes you from your use of a Professional Wrestler's name as your own. In fact, I can hardly believe that you know about signatures in emails. But I digress).

I think it's worse to ask EVERYONE THAT HE E-MAILS for money, rather than just me. Undignified, even.

@Jonny: Just because you don't think I'm funny doesn't make it so. All that we've established is that Thorne's readers don't like my humour. I've posited a few reasons why that is throughout my comments here.

@Astounded: "seem to have been removed at my request". Sadly you comment at me without first giving me the courtesy of reading my articles. As such I've stopped reading your comment, and will not respond to the remainder.

@drakul: I did not want to know, but thank you for the information. This happens to me as well, from time to time.

@"david is funny": By capitalizing "Himself", yet also writing my article in an anti-David tone, I was implying sarcasm. Thank you for allowing me to explain that to you. I'm sure there were other people reading it that did not understand either but were afraid to ask for fear of looking stupid (which boggles the mind).

With a sigh I re-iterate that I don't care that he made the stuff up, but rather that the news media was too stupid to understand that it was fiction and reported it as fact, causing all sorts of fanatical people (see them above) to believe that it was true.

@Mookie: Yes, he really got me good, what with that satire that was based upon the few things he knows (or believes to be true) about me. It really stung, reading something fictional. The night after he published it, I did indeed take a shit so powerful that it blew a second hole in my rear.

@wtf: Glad you had enough time to compose that witty comment, though.

@Farnsworth, [Professor?]: Yes, obviously it's not fake. Sure, my wife is obtaining a fourth job to pay for pornography. Indeed, I work at Burger King. That photo is 100% accurate and I do like to look at 8 pictures of unattractive women at once. He's caught me, and accurately described my life. He must have, because everything on his site is factual.

At first I was coming at this subject with a bit of humour, because it's really not a big deal that he invented these things. But when I see how many people blithely accept what they read on the internet, providing it come from a sufficiently "nicely designed" site, it just saddens me.

Oh, and please elaborate upon the great inner conflict you must be going through when you find the word "dicklock" offensive, yet you can't stop creaming your vagina over the man whose site starts out like this:

David Thorne being dickish

And then presents you with this on every page:

Lucius in a wig

@Jealous!: Yes, go ahead. You can alternately spare yourself the trouble and just save the picture above. Idiot.
  Monday, August 24, 2009 by scott
  To scott
  How many more comments telling "you suck!",do you need,to commit suicide????....have you become totally immune to them?? ...plz kill yourself fast...so that we can all live in peace from your jokes!
  Friday, October 02, 2009 by sachin
  Hello again DickLock
  mintrETARDed


Priceless coral...WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??

and anyway..the color seems mint red..that is the what you have named your site...neverimind...
  Friday, October 09, 2009 by Martin
  Scott's pompus opinions, self satisfaction, lack of humour and racist undertones
  I'm so annoyed with myself because I did indeed Google you after reading the hilarious article on David Thorne's website to see if you are a real person and why he thought you were such a tosspot.

Oh dear, I've used a word they may not use in the USA (tosspot) and therefore you wouldn't understand it seeing as you are of the breed of people that need "English spoken with an accent" subtitled on various programs and interviews. Although in your almighty wisdom perhaps you can figure it out - after all, you should have used one instead of making such a mess over your desk while viewing the photo David sent you.

Now I do not have any issue with Americans and have several American friends however there is a stereotype famous here that you are living up to with every inane, dull and ignorant sentence you type. The stereotype of a Xenophobic, ignorant, sexist, bigot American male that thinks he and his opinions are more important than that of anyone else in the world. This is proven, by yourself, in the very fact that you have an entire blog ranting on about what "bothers you".

You "claim" you do not read the comments on your site for fear you may appear as vain, however you are constantly referring to your self-perceived brilliance (e.g. creation of your site, your programming language, your [poor] sense of humour), your replies are many and are directed to several specific visitors making it quite clear you DO trawl through the comments on your own site. You use pompous archaic words and phrases such as “opined” and incorrectly use the word "whom". Although you must think you are terribly clever this only provides more laughs for we who are intelligent and recognise your pretentious self-importance.

At first I laughed at you, then I was disgusted with you and your ignorance, and now I truly pity you and your sad and sorry existence where you can not appreciate a truly wonderful, clever and witty sense of humour such as that of David Thorne. I now see you do exist, sadly, and it is clear why David thought you were a tosspot. Please don’t visit Australia, you’d probably only get all huffy and sad (like Harry Conick Jr) about all the whizzing noises going straight over your head!
  Friday, October 30, 2009 by Cosmo
  You bored me ...
  that's an achievement, I've read the most boring texts, books, conspiracy theories and personal rants on this planet in any subject, but you take the cake.
-200
  Thursday, November 26, 2009 by Ivan
  You bother me
  First, let me preface this by stating that the only reason I googled your site was to put David's post in context. I now understand, with great clarity, why he felt the need to write his post.

Second, 'Who' vs 'Whom': for such an omniscient being, you seem to have difficulty determining which to use, so I have included the link below. You may peruse it at leisure, whenever you wish to take a break from castigating people for their lack of intelligence.

http://web.ku.edu/~edit/whom.html

Third, your humour is banal, and your putdowns are pathetic.

Fourth, people find you unfunny not because they're too stupid to get it but because they're not stupid enough.

I truly hope that you are not being paid to write this drivel. In fact, I would gladly pay you to stop. I've seen some dross on the internet but yours surely takes the cake.

P.S. I bet you're a real hoot at parties.
  Friday, November 27, 2009 by Heidi
  You dont need a subject, its a fucking comment
  Scott, you are the best! the most astute and humorous person in the whole world! Nah seriously you are pathetic...
  Sunday, December 06, 2009 by Your wife
  Logo
  Hey! your logo is a bomb! you got the font and cutted some serifs! genius! you are the best designer in the world ever
  Sunday, December 06, 2009 by Designer
  Really?
  This is just humiliating on your part- David OWNS you.

David >>>>>>>>> you.

Major humour fail!
  Wednesday, December 23, 2009 by E
  wow..
  You have been so clearly outplayed by David. You just don't seem to GET IT. Humor is humor. Nobody cares if something's fictional or not. Nobody cares if your wife saw a picture of a spider either.

Your blog is not funny. You come across as a sad sack of shit. The worst part of all is your lack of creativity. It's easy to pick other people's work to shreds - much more difficult to CREATE something of your own.

And yes, I arrived at your blog by visiting David's site. Without a doubt the most entertaining site I have seen in years.

Know when to stop.
  Tuesday, February 09, 2010 by Daniel
  oops.. forgot to mention..
  your T Shirt design is shit. Upgrade from MS Paint or stop trying to be an artist. Actually.. if we have to choose between you being an artist, and you being a blogger - please designs some more shirts.
  Tuesday, February 09, 2010 by Daniel
 
  I am certain the following is true:

David Thorne = Scott Mintred.

Am I late to the party and this has already been revealed, or is this news?
  Saturday, March 13, 2010 by Andy
  This site
  Despite your incredibly witty line "This site is best viewed on a screen using eyes," this site is in fact best not viewed at all.
  Monday, July 26, 2010 by anonymous
  david
  haha got to this website from reading david's article! i love david's shirts:)
  Monday, September 06, 2010 by b
  Sad
  You are a sad sad person.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Meandme
 
  Your website makes me want to punch babies. Way to go, jerk. Babies are getting punched right now because of you.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Fake trk
  Minturd
  You know your problem as regards David Thorne? Reading his website, he comes across as someone who is only doing it for fun and doesn't give a flying fuck if some idiot chooses to take offence at what he writes.
You, on the other hand, seem to be constantly simmering in such bilious vitriol that no one will ever enjoy reading your whining complaints. Even the subtitle on your index page, "This bothers me!" goes some way to put people off your opinions before even reading them.
Who cares what bothers you? We all have things in our lives that could be considered bothersome but we don't all expose our impatience with the world by creating a website and spouting such pathetic gobshite as you seem to feel the need to do.
If something bothers you, get off your fat arse and actually DO something about it you fucking idiot.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by The Mind Gap
  OK, I'm done here!
  Scott,

You are DESPERATE, and that's the understatement of the year!

You try to emulate David Thorne in your writing style, but quickly FAIL in every capacity.

Put it this way, let's just say that Davids emails are fake, let's for this moment give you that for the sake of argument...

his site is MUCH more evocative and entertaining than yours EVER will be and I'd take fake hilarity over realistic boredom any day of the week!

Though I can, by my own experience and level of sarcastic response and the reaction of the perpetrators, that David's email streams are most likely 100% real!

I'm in the same business he is and deal with the same types of idiots on a daily basis, and have for decades, stupidity is an endless onslaught, as has been proven by your vain attempts to one-up David.

You need help son!
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Shadyzz
  huh
  this is terrible. everything here is terrible. are you serious? this has got to be a joke or something, i refuse to believe someone this oblivious and mind-numbing exists.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by what
  how mintred sucks ass
  this site sucks so much ass. i am fucking done with it. you are delusional to think you are funny. or maybe just retarded. god just go fuck off. better yet i want to see a full blown internet blog battle between you and dave.

so i say keep fighting. keep denying what everyone is saying about you not being funny and sucking. i don't think your funny but as long as YOU do i'll be happy. now i need to egg you on

david doesn't know what he is talking about. neither do all these people i can't believe he has tricked all of them. if only they were as smart and funny as you. you should totally send him a burning email and try and jank on his ass to show everyone who's boss.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by mintred sucks ass
  My love for Scott
  Dear Scott, may I ask why you feel the need to take on the entire world? Is there not the slightest possibility that you could be wrong on a matter?

I appreciate that you will respond to this comment by telling my I'm wrong in some sort of poorly-construed attempt at irony, so do go ahead.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Michael Heseltine
  Dicklock
  Also, what is a dicklock? It appears to be a combination between a dick and a lock. This would be both impractical and painful.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Michael Heseltine
  Not funny.
  You really have some kind of a crush on David Thorne and are obsessed with him. Please die of AIDS.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by You are
  Split Personalities
  Before I get to my actual comment, I should say- simply to avoid your ubiquitous accusations- that I am not David Thorne, commenting in another name. Although you certainly have the paranoid THEY mentality, we are not all David Thorne. I am Grady, I live in Chicago, and I use my real name when I comment here because I trust your dazzling deductive abilities will only find me out, anyway.

That said, here is my comment. While I am a fan of Thorne's, am not automatically hating on you just to follow the herd. As a matter of fact, I had hoped that coming to this site would salvage something- surely you couldn't be as small-minded as you seemed in your email conversation on 27b/6. However, when I began to read your ahem "work" I discovered that you are the most appallingly petulant internet (so-called) writer I have ever seen. And your only talent is alienating yourself from people with radical theories, delusions of grandeur, and obcenely un-funny temper tantrums, where you force out inadequate similes in an attempt to illicit humor by sheer force.

It is by my own decision that you are a disreputable cretin, not by David Thorne's or anyone in the comments (whether actual dopplegangers of his, or not).

Why don't you blame your shortcomings and failures on yourself for a change, a maybe you will gain a little credibility. Or, you can continue holding your breath and pounding your little fists on the floor of the internet. No one cares about you, either way. And this is fault to no one but you.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Grady Richards
  Let it go, Fag
  Give into your man-love of David Thorne. You are such a homo.

  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Scott is gay
  Weaksauce
  I laughed out loud at David's site, and I found this one to be lame. You reak of "My dad can beat up your dad" and it is not flattering. I'd explain more of why you fail at life, but I have to drop a large steaming Scott in the guest bathroom.
I'm going to enjoy it too because I've been standing at the computer holding it in for the past 20 minutes and it has compacted and made it denser than it otherwise would have been, so it'll resist coming out and stretch my butthole real good. Plus I've been eating peanuts and cashews so it'll scratch a little bit. It's gonna be the kind of Scott that I miss when it's over. Like roller skating for a few hours and taking off your skates. It'll be my ever-present phantom Scott.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by MJ
  fake
  I love that David has gone to all the trouble of creating this dull beige website with all the sad worthless unfunny articles only to make a fake story up. He is truly a genius. I
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by 7 legged spider
  I can't believe the deep suckyness of your sucky page.
 
Oh, So there's the root of the problem: you are jealous because your wife loves David and his page just as much as the rest of us (if she even exists).

I just can't explain the extreme depths of the suckyness of your website. So I wont. I know you know that you really really suck deep inside of your fat fat tummy so I'll just end it here.

Mel.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Mel.
  Does David Thorne have too much time on his hands???
  Am I the only person to think this, but this website smacks of David Thorne. Methinks David has set this website up himself, maybe?

Funny as hell though....
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Colonel
  David is so cool.
  If this Mintred is indeed only a character made up by David Thorne, I would not be surprised. I believe that Dave is pretty much of a genious, and also SO attractive. But he's not a loser with too much time on his hands. Mintred on the other hand..
I mean, he seems like SUCH a loser, that he may very well not even exist - like his wife.

Mel.
  Tuesday, September 28, 2010 by Mel.
 
  Anyone else's think Mintred is a joke character made up by David? It still pretty clever and the writing style is similar between them
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Steven bars?
  Get over it Scott
  You just don't have the brain cells to keep up with the 'job' that's being done on you. Your fast tracking yourself into being the internets 'NEXT TOP IDIOT'. Being famous is one thing but your too stupid to see that you'll just be labelled a douche bag!
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Stuey griffen
  Are you for real?
  Either you have an excellent sense of humour and this all tongue in cheek, or sadly like most Americans you fail to grasp the intricacies of sarcasm and to be honest mate this is just a LITTLE bit desperate.

Whats the point of this site anyway?

The humour is slightly lacking and it is the colour of vomit.

priceless coral...
Have you EVER seen coral?????
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by George
  So Cute!
  You are soooo cute Scott!! You have the best colours and the best comedy ever!! like I totally told my sister that when she said you were "a load your mother should of swallowed" that she was totally wrong and that like you should never go run a warm bath and like pick up a fresh pack of Gillette razors and like run it down your arm, not across like some people like totally I want to have face sex with you!!
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by rhomel
  I would be laughing
  if you didn't make me so sad. Maybe...maybe you're someone who shouldn't actually be on the internet.

It's ok, you don't have to respond to this, I won't be back to check.
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Janellionaire
  Amazing!
  How did you know it was me?
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Mr Daniel Dicklock
  You have way
  too much time on your hands. You should get a job or something.
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Not David, not Scott
  yikes
  Someone is Jealous... Mintred get a better web designer and then open a candy store because I am sure you will attract more children and have more fun than you do with this site.
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by yikes
  I get it
  It makes perfect sense now! The only possible conclusion for his obsessive behavior in bashing 27bslash6 is his wife had her first and only orgasm after reading his humor. Scott, don't let it ruin your marriage. Start reading 27bslash6 together in the bedroom.
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by David
  I don't get it.
  Why is this mintred asshat even engaging David Thorne in the first place? David is running rings around him,, is he *that* desperate for attention or just thick as pig crap?
  Wednesday, September 29, 2010 by Juck
 
  Maybe people would buy your cheap shits (Correction: Shirts*) if they looked halfway decent, because as-of now they look like a high-school art class student stole the design from Vignelli to win a talent show. I'm sure the student lost however, and was promptly beat up afterwords for being such a pretentious prick. What hospital are you located in so I can send you flowers you are allergic to?
  Thursday, September 30, 2010 by Chainer
  Comments on existing subjects do not require their own subject line
  Mintred at best you are a xenophobe;
1. “A man obviously of Australian living.” &
2. “You will be able to witness its unveiling later tonight tomorrow night, or Yesterday Morning three weeks ago Thursday for those of you in Australia” at worst a racist;
3. “witnessed by our overweight Salvadorean cleaning lady. (I'm not sure if that's how one would specify a person from El Salvador, but how relevant can such a mistake possibly be?)”

A friend of mine likes to observe that, sadly, the world rewards mediocrity. Looking at the traffic you are getting for what is very ordinary and offensive content, he appears to be correct.

BTW …
1. Quite so. A lot of Australians are happy, witty and well educated, so Dave Thorne is a good example of type.
2. Jump on Google Earth Mintred. See the US of A? No? Just put it on Satellite mode and look for missile silos, paranoid obese humans and SUV clogged streets. See Australia? No of course you think we are part of New Zealand. Just Google “great surf” and “fantastic places to ruin with awful exports of American culture”. Oh, shit that will also turn up New Zealand, so Google “monotreme”. These are egg laying mammals we have here (platypus and echidna) and the Kiwis don’t, so that should help you. See that funny little line running North/South through the Pacific which delineates days? Let’s call it the International Date Line, shall we? Now do you remember from your school days that the Earth rotates counter-clockwise on its rotational axis if viewed from high above the North Pole? Hmm ? Toss all these factoids together in that salad bowl you call your cranium and you might just work out that we here in OZ are a day ahead of you fellas and not three weeks behind. You knew that of course, and were just trying to be a mean minded xenophobe, but I thought you’d appreciate the lesson.
3. It’s Salvadoran and the mistake is relevant to those of us who are not xenophobes and racists. Would you like to be referred to as a Fat Arsed Americunt?


Also what’s up with call
  Thursday, September 30, 2010 by Dicklocked by Mintred
  Make your comment box bigger you muppet
  Continued...

Also what’s up with calling every person who you have offered the option to leave a comment, a “dicklock”? I was unaware of this offensive term so I referred to Urban Dictionary and got this; A circumstance which results in the absence of sexual activity where otherwise such activity would take place. Similar to cockblock only dicklock can be attributed to benign persons or non-animate objects. EG A hot man can be dicklocked by wearing an ugly shirt.The term originated in Oakville, Ontario.
“I think that bluenotes stripped club shirt caused a little dicklock.”
“John you’re such a dicklock when you wear a faux-hawk.”
I’m gonna edit this to also read “Dude, you’re such a dicklock when you mention Scott Mintred in public”
  Thursday, September 30, 2010 by Dicklocked by Mintred
  Feel free to check my IP address to validate my identity
  It's obvious that you're socially retarded, but I'd reckon that you're also mentally retarded, judging by your poor use of grammar and complete misunderstanding of humor. Also, your raging jealousy and delusions about your own intelligence and wit suggest a mental disorder.

And I love how the fact that David voted down on one of your articles means he has bad character, but you have an entire blog dedicated to tearing him down. Not only are you a complete troll, you're also a hypocrite. A hypocrite who doesn't understand the proper usage of quotation marks, I might add.

You're not funny. You're not smart. You're insignificant.

You don't have any fans and you're only known as "that douche that's jealous of David Thorne."

I bet David laughs just as hard as I do when he reads your pathetic emails.

Get a life.

Or don't, and continue doing this, because I will admit that laughing at morons like you is mildly ausing.

By the way, I would fuck David Thorne in a heartbeat.
  Friday, October 01, 2010 by I Heart David Thorne
  WOW!
  I have been on this site for about 30 minutes now, at first I thought that you were David Thorne pretending to be somebody else, but clearly this is not the case, if it were I would have been laughing by now, plus whois says

"Registrant: Scott Mintred"

and I'm not sure whether or not you can register a domain name under a pseudonym. Either way you site sucks!
  Monday, October 04, 2010 by Benjamin Sutton
  you really suck
  Wow i have never been so bored in my life.Why didnt you just get to the point & ask him to verify the e-mails or something instead of trying to sound as witty as he is? are you pissed cause he got your wife turned on? or perhaps you have no life what-so-ever? anyone who follows you(all 4 of them) sound like the same losers i'd kick in the balls in high school...you know a place for education,something you seem to lack in.
please die & send your wife my way, unless shes a fat W.o.w. loser.
Regards,
You suck
  Thursday, October 21, 2010 by you suck
  You're a serious Turd ...
  *Yawn* You are obviously trying to be as witty as David Thorne, but you have failed miserably. Jealous much???
  Friday, October 22, 2010 by MYGOD!
  Seriously you ARE a retard and a half ...
  I have read your entire article, and I cannot believe you actually think you are "exposing" David Thorne. Your own comments make you look like a complete moron, and you seem to have no idea about "sarcasm"; it's an Australian thing, we tend to use it sometimes to show up people's stupidity.
So I guess while you keep trying to hack hack hack with your little hatchet at David Thorne's Tall Poppy, rest assured that the presence of the "shit" you call a website will simply act as fertilizer for that said Tall Poppy ...
  Friday, October 22, 2010 by ummm whatever...
  This site is hilarious!!
  This site really is awesome!! :D it's made my night, I'm so glad I came here after looking at http://www.27bslash6.com David Thorne is witty.. but Scott is the master! Scott deserves a medal; just look at how much effort he went to to publicly humiliate himself and lose all credibility (whether he had any to begin with is still up for debate).
Nothing makes me smile as much as a pretentious blog backfiring onto the author. Epic Fail. It's priceless.. he's so smug at his "defeat" of DT and totally blind to the overwhelmingly obvious- that he's just digging himself into a bigger pit of fail.

I wonder if Scott realises that instead of annoying DT in anyway, he just served as cheap entertainment.. lol way to go, doing exactly what DT would've wanted you to do.
  Tuesday, November 23, 2010 by Socks
  Scott. Timetravelling internets detective and Pogmaster
  The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which unskilled people make poor decisions and reach erroneous conclusions, but their incompetence denies them the metacognitive ability to realize their mistakes.
The unskilled therefore suffer from illusory superiority, rating their own ability as above average, much higher than it actually is, while the highly skilled underrate their abilities, suffering from illusory inferiority. This leads to the situation in which less competent people rate their own ability higher than more competent people. It also explains why actual competence may weaken self-confidence. Competent individuals falsely assume that others have an equivalent understanding. "Thus, the miscalibration of the incompetent stems from an error about the self, whereas the miscalibration of the highly competent stems from an error about others."
  Thursday, December 16, 2010 by Tash
  Why are you allowed the right to live?
  Seriously, it's a waste of time...
  Tuesday, January 11, 2011 by martacles
  Why??
  Why does the overwhelming majority of your site (what I have seen anyway) seem to be a pissing contest with David Thorne? On his site he has one article about you (assuming it’s the same Scott) but yours is so littered with stuff about David that it would appear, if given the chance, you would not hesitate to felate him. Is it a big thank you to David for giving you the publicity you have been secretly masturbating over for the last few years or do people only visit your site to see if there is any retorts from David?? The latter is the reason I’m here in case that needed clearing up. Call me crazy but why don’t you come up with some original funny shit then people will visit your site to read YOUR stuff, just a thought??
  Monday, January 24, 2011 by Jay
  Is that you?
  You know, since you are accusing seemingly everyone else of being David Thorne, I wouldn't be surprised if you were ACTUALLY David Thorne himself, mixing up controversy and such, also, I just typed "David Thorne Rim Dent" into google, and you're name came right up, so if you don't want to be associated with him, perhaps you should consider removing all mention of David Thorne and "Rim Dent" from you're website.
  Sunday, March 13, 2011 by Tom



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